A New Baby

One of the other math teachers had a baby a couple of weeks ago.  There seem to be a lot of families of our acquaintance having babies, perhaps because many of the Tanzanian teachers here are in their 20s or 30s.  We have learned of some cultural differences associated with these blessed events.

One of these is that babies are indeed "blessings".  New parents aren't to be congratulated, as on an achievement, because babies are a gift from God.  This is true even if the family is very poor or if the parents are unwed.  Babies are a blessing.

Another difference is that a woman's pregnancy is not a proper topic for conversation.  I was told by a woman who spent 12 years as a missionary in this community that miscarriages can and do happen up to 7 months of pregnancy, so chitchat about when the baby is due, and so on, is not welcome until the very end of the term.  The same goes for naming the child.  Infant mortality is high, and though parents love and care for their newborns, they don't take the step of naming them until they are a month old, or more.

The middle-class women we know--other teachers and wives of teachers--have their babies in the local hospital, which reportedly offers good maternal and newborn care.  Women in communities far from healthcare facilities use a midwife, if they are lucky enough to have one, or other women to help them with delivering the baby.  Unfortunately, these rural mothers are usually the ones most at risk for complications due to youth (marriage at 14 is not uncommon) and malnutrition.

But our colleague Ester's little girl was born healthy and beautiful.  Two weeks after the birth those of us in the math/physics department went to visit them at their home.  Angela, a chemistry teacher and Ester's close friend, accompanied us and showed us the way to the house.  Ester and her husband and (now) two children live in a 3-room semi-detached home made of concrete with a tin roof, like ours.  There is a separate small building used as a wash house and I saw an outhouse in the back yard.  There were goats and ducks on the property.  Inside, the living room is furnished in a nice middle-class fashion.  We took off our shoes at the door, and then stepped in onto a rug.  There are two overstuffed loveseats, a comfy chair, and a coffee table.  A small TV sits on a cabinet in the corner, with a picture of Jesus hanging above it.  And there is an imposing hutch, which holds the china on which we were served tea.  

Mark and I went, as did four other math and physics teachers, all male.  We were greeted by Ester's mother (whom we called Mama Ester, in the tradition of the culture) and served tea, bread, boiled eggs, and soda by a young woman who was not introduced but who is probably another relative.  Ester joined us, and she looks well.  She was convinced to bring the child out for us to see.  Not that I could see that much of her, besides a very cute little face.  Babies are bundled up, in Tanzania.  This one was wearing standard baby clothes, including a hat and, presumably booties, and was tightly wrapped in receiving blanket and a big fluffy blanket.  It didn't feel that cold to me, but Tanzanians feel the chill more than Mark and I do.

What surprised me most about the visit was the fact that the male teachers all wanted to hold the baby and cuddle her.  One of them, a single man in his mid-twenties, rocked and talked with her for a long time.  I think he must come from a large family, and have experience with babies.  Certainly, that behavior is not what I have seen from American men of the same age and marital state.

Our visit lasted well over an hour.  Before leaving, we gave gifts to the mother.  Mark and I had bought baby clothes and booties in Arusha the weekend before, and brought them along.  The other teachers pooled their funds and bought flour and sugar at a local shop on our way to the home.  Sugar, especially, is considered a very nice gift here, I've learned.  A Maasai man may bring sugar to the parents of a woman he is courting, to get into their good favor.  Ester didn't open the gifts while we were there, as is also typical.  I did show the baby outfit and booties to Angela beforehand, and she was impressed, so I think they were fine gifts too.

It's good to know that, because Angela is a dear friend of ours, and her baby is due in another two weeks.